Posts by rather be in hades

61

Trying to talk to my mom - really discouraged, need help.

by rather be in hades in

jw
friends

so, i'm new here and i've decided to finally tell my mom the truth about jws.. and sorry for the long post.

i'm at my wits end.. here's some background:.

i grew p in a congregation in california, i'm not a born in, though i was raised in it from 5 - about 20. arond 20 i pretty mch faded out, bt the emotional ups and downs were jst all too much.

rather be in hades

i know. i still can't help being disappointed. i've been telling myself for the past 30 minutes that i'm not disappointed, but i am. she barely let me get a word in edgewise. then i kept telling her not to take it like i'm blaming her, that i nderstand, but that's all she was doing.

now i'm pissed. honestly i'm thinking of just going back to shnning her. i can't have an honest relationship with her. she can't let me open up at all. how can that be an honest relationship? i'll never feel right around her. it feels exactly like when i was 19 and going through all this for the first time.

she tried her best bt the fact of the matter is this:

she raised me in a cult because she didn't do due diligence. she raised me in a cult that completely screwed me up and if you raise a kid in a cult you are WRONG for doing so. she needed to hear it and it angers me that she thinks that she did everything right and that i screwed up my life on my own. i made bad decisions, i take responsibility for them, however i made those bad decisions off of her brainwashing.

i tried to put the "WE all might have missed out on things like my baseball/whatever games" and the first thing out of her mouth was "well let me tell you i barely made any money as a single mother and blah blah blah" and that's not the fucking point at all. so if we couldn't afford it fine, but keeping me from making friends with the worldly kids? come on. or when i'm getting hit up by all of these schools bt i can't really talk to my mom and the elders are honding me about making a 'spiritually wise decision'? she doesn't realize how badly she completely fucked over the family with that. she comletely fcked me over with raising me in a cult like that. even if i took me 4 years to get my cachelors in engineering, i'd have finished it by 20. so that's 6 years of earnings with a degree in engineering i missed out on, and years of therapy i needed to have to compensate for that. i know on the one hand it can be said i needed to simply "get over it", bt anyone who has experienced that awful depth of depression knows that it's not something you can just get over. i hate to sound weak, but it was stronger than me at that time.

i'm out, i'm done, i'm washing my hands of this. i jst hope that she's not going to needlessly pass away, or needlessly suffer for some buullshit lies from a corporation.

61

Trying to talk to my mom - really discouraged, need help.

by rather be in hades in

jw
friends

so, i'm new here and i've decided to finally tell my mom the truth about jws.. and sorry for the long post.

i'm at my wits end.. here's some background:.

i grew p in a congregation in california, i'm not a born in, though i was raised in it from 5 - about 20. arond 20 i pretty mch faded out, bt the emotional ups and downs were jst all too much.

rather be in hades

thank you everyone for the suggestions. i was hoping that she'd wake up, i'm afraid it's gonna be a long time. i'm impressed, i love my mom, but i never really thought of her as the most spiritual. i mean, she followed the doctrine and everything, but it's not like when i was growing up she'd always have her wt stdy prepared.

when you get to a point where your only son could have been molested and you don't want to hear the truth, then you've overdosed on the blue pill.

asking for a bible stdy sre as hell didn't work :P

61

Trying to talk to my mom - really discouraged, need help.

by rather be in hades in

jw
friends

so, i'm new here and i've decided to finally tell my mom the truth about jws.. and sorry for the long post.

i'm at my wits end.. here's some background:.

i grew p in a congregation in california, i'm not a born in, though i was raised in it from 5 - about 20. arond 20 i pretty mch faded out, bt the emotional ups and downs were jst all too much.

rather be in hades

i'm disappointed and i don't think i can really look at her the same. part of me understands, i was like that to when i believed. but damn

i never really knew my mom and i don't think i'll ever get that chance. she's going to breeze through 2014 without a blink.

100 years since christ became king! it's jsut around the corner.

being a jehovah's witness must be a lot like being a pittsburgh pirates fan. there's always next year

50

Sherriff Joe Arpaio

by Lady Lee in

jw
friends

i got the following from my daughter - jail time -- the way it should be.

maricopa county sherriff.

to those of you not familiar with joe arpaio, he is the maricopacounty sheriff (arizona) and he keeps getting elected over and over again.. these are some of the reasons why:.

rather be in hades

what's happening? i have friends in phx and they absolutely hate the guy

21

Help what should I tell my mom?!

by Butterflyleia85 in

jw
friends

little background.

i'm dfed been dfed for about 4 to 6 years if you include the first dfment and getting back in for 6 months then 2008 dfed second time.. i did alot of research in 2010 to now and well from getting dfed for a total different reason just makes me look like a sinner who is unrepentent in my family.

the only people who know my researching is mainly my sister and mom.. .

rather be in hades

rootin' for ya. if she's to the point she has a worldly bf, then it would seem to me that she kinda wants out already.

61

Trying to talk to my mom - really discouraged, need help.

by rather be in hades in

jw
friends

so, i'm new here and i've decided to finally tell my mom the truth about jws.. and sorry for the long post.

i'm at my wits end.. here's some background:.

i grew p in a congregation in california, i'm not a born in, though i was raised in it from 5 - about 20. arond 20 i pretty mch faded out, bt the emotional ups and downs were jst all too much.

rather be in hades

lol plenty of the counseling. it sorta helped, but like everything else in life, it's jst gotta click. eventually it did.so i finally feel like it's gonna be alright, i can do x,y,z and i'm gonna be ok. someone else said, and i wish i remember who, that they want to be an 'ex-ex'jw' and i thought that was beatifully put. i feel like i'm almost there...just gotta straighten things out with my mom.

i'm not trying to blast jws. i'd like to get her out, but this whole thing is kinda hard to explain. the way my family treated me the past few years was terrible. i hated it, i hated how they viewed me. if that makes sense. and in part they'd be right, bt not for the right reason. none of them realized what was truly going on wiht me and ugh...i dnno...the final straw was this set of incidents and 'talks' with my mom last year and it was incredibly hurtful. felt betrayed, angry, etc and i couldn't say, "you raised me in a f*****cult you crazy *****and you were a terrible mother for raising me in this."

i mean how do you say that? and to top it off, like i said, the rest of my family has been treating me in a similar manner despite not being jws. it's like interest. it accumlates. they don't understand how i was feeling, what i was thinking, what was going on with me and if i'm going to fix those relationships...it's important to me they understand. it's been an gly year but i think i needed it and the last few months have been different. i do feel a kind of peace. i've always told myself that she was a great mom who was misguided, but now i FEEL it. i look at my aunt who isn't a jw and yet still treated me weird and i listen to the way she talks to others and i came to realize, well she's just not good at being sympathetic. it wasn't until i started relating her own life experiences and she had to start defending herself that she kinda started understanding what was in my head. so i've got some peace, i'm trying to make more lol.

the gb has done an amazing job in buying themselves outs. they should play baseball.

i thought for sure the organ transplants and blood stff would trip her out. she LOVES medical stuff and seeing the society's stance on organ transplants when we were lamenting my grndmother not being able to have one which was essentially her death sentence. her response woke me up. i just don't think i can go down the blood route without blowing up. she's going to jst chalk it up to 'they make mistakes cuz they're not inspired' and that's gonna be like an itch that won't go away for me. i'm gonna have to reread some of those passages. never thought about it that way. actually kinda makes sense. i mean, we're talking basically about tribal people right? sounds kinda like the native americans. i'll never be able to argue that though. she'd simply dismiss me as not knowing for sure.

it'd be nice if god coulda written the bible a lil more clearly ;)

49

Would You Listen To A Prayer From A JW And Say Amen If They Said A Prayer In Your Presence?

by minimus in

jw
friends

my mom has had visits from various jws and they have asked her if they could say a prayer before they left.

i respectfully listened to the prayers while i was visiting and might silently say amen if i felt the prayer was appropriate for my mom.. i'm just curious, how would you handle this type of situation?.

rather be in hades

i leave the room/avoid the prayer. if i can't i patiently wait for them to finish, eyes open.

my mom spoiled santa claus for me, the least i can do is spoil god for her lol

21

Help what should I tell my mom?!

by Butterflyleia85 in

jw
friends

little background.

i'm dfed been dfed for about 4 to 6 years if you include the first dfment and getting back in for 6 months then 2008 dfed second time.. i did alot of research in 2010 to now and well from getting dfed for a total different reason just makes me look like a sinner who is unrepentent in my family.

the only people who know my researching is mainly my sister and mom.. .

rather be in hades

butterflyleia...pm'd you

43

think i'm becoming an atheist

by rather be in hades in

jw
friends

i was just thinking about how often i prayed when i was going downhill.. now i subscribed wholeheartedly to the 'don't pray for bullshit requests' concept, so at first i rarely prayed.. starting around middle school, 9/10 i prayed for friends.

didn't really pray to stop the teasing, my fists did some of that and besides...racism isn't/wasn't jehovah's fault anyway and i can't pray for that to end when he allowed the witnesses to suffer in ww2.. through high school, same issue and then when i started pioneering and hanging out with some of the other witnesses, those prayers prayers for friends intensified cuz they were asses.. but they were dominated by the prayers to love god starting around 15. i didn't want to read the magazines, despite how much i love reading.

didn't want to stdy the lessons, didn't want to plan my presentations, though i did enjoy giving the talks and crafting them.

rather be in hades

lol thanks nc.

i know this is gonna sound weird, but if there is no god, is there even a point to the atheist label?

maybe i just want to say, "i'm a human dammit! nothing more, nothing less"

21

Help what should I tell my mom?!

by Butterflyleia85 in

jw
friends

little background.

i'm dfed been dfed for about 4 to 6 years if you include the first dfment and getting back in for 6 months then 2008 dfed second time.. i did alot of research in 2010 to now and well from getting dfed for a total different reason just makes me look like a sinner who is unrepentent in my family.

the only people who know my researching is mainly my sister and mom.. .

rather be in hades

everyone is different. my mom may or may not be exactly like your mom, bt i'm going through the same thing, but without the extra family drama. sorta...i mean i'd hate for her marriage to break apart. my stepfather believes, but i think he's also reasonable.

in my case, i've come to the conclusion that i can attack 607 bce and 1914. and by doing that i can kill two birds with one stone.

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the witnesses believe they are the ones preaching the good news.

the good news, according to them, is that in 1914 christ became king and this signifies the time of the end when soon jesus will strike down the wicked and bring back unicorns and rainbows.

well how do we know it happened in 1914? go to the daniel book and it's all spelled out there

wait a sec...JERUSALEM wasn't destroyed in 607. so if that's the case and everything revolves around jerusalem's destruction...does that mean the good news is false as well?

someone took the time to post encyclopedia pictures he took of maybe 30 or more encyclopedia entries that show jerusalem was destroyed in 587, even mentions zedekiah losing the throne or something in 587.

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your mom seems like she has one foot out the door already. i would think if you reasoned this out gently, then you can maybe get her asking more questions. just make sure she doesn't start asking those questions to your sister lol.

i like the bible stdy idea. i'm gonna ask my mom abot us discussing stuff every week. she can count time and all that shit and i can break her free of the cult if i have to go that route. maybe your mom can do the same to your sister if you can crack your mom.

simple reasoning and it completely breaks the witnesses at the core.